Well Well, I have been waiting for my Spouse visa to be approved since 28th of May 09 and it is now nearing the 28th fo July, two months. I still haven't heard anything and the best thing of it all, I can't even call to chase or to even check with regards to the status of it. That's what the Home Office is like. I am currently in a lobo situation where I am neither here or there.

My ex bosses are desperately waiting for me to get back to work and I am suddenly feeling that as well as I need to work. I mean The Roadster has the means and capabilities to take care of me, but I suddenly lose the independance that I have before. The ability to earn my own money and most importantly, the ability to spend MY OWN money. I mean, lots of girls would want their husband to buy things for them, pay the things that they want. But I always believe that if I have the capabilities to earn my own money, I would have the satisfaction to buy my own things with my own money, just like my Vivienne Westwood Ring and My LV Wallet. There is this sense of pride when you can buy the things you want with your own hard earned money.

As you all know, The Roadster and I haven't been married long, but yet there is this sudden awakening of my maternal instincts and craving all of a sudden to have a child, WHICH I QUICKLY Shrugged off. I mean, it's not that we do not want children, The Roadster and I are quite practical with regards to that. I mean I know he adopts an "IF it happens, it happens" attitude towards it. I, on the other hand, would rather both of us be prepared, financially and emotionally. I mean I know I would get child benefit when my child is born here, but I am a singaporean and we singaporean no nothing about benefits. I mean I know that the government back home is giving more benefits if you have more children back home, but here.. Have you seen the number of young teenage mothers pushing prams? They are not even in their late teens. Some of them are as young as 14. I really do wonder what is going on in the British society, one whom the world look up to with regards to tradition, culture and the kind of "proper" up-bringing that older generation try to instill in the youngsters today. Unfortunately, Britain is filled with drunk yobs who have no questions or doubt in their minds to lob you one if you so pisses them off. I mean I sometimes don't even feel safe going out if it gets dark and in the winter time when it gets dark at around 5 pm, I am no where seen outside.

Currently, I am trying to fill my time up, while waiting for my visa I might add, by doing crocheting, knitting, cooking and then Wii. I am still playing MY SIMS at the moment and I hate to say this, but I did something that as a person who DOES Play RPG Games in her haydays, Like Diablo and Warcraft, that I almost managed to complete the game, but being caught up in the spur of the moment, lost her ability to save as she goes along, only to realise that when her Wii hangs on her, rendering her to the starting point where she started. I mean come on! I spent nearly One whole day reaching one star and Now I have to start all over again... CRAP. Somehow, if you can read between the lines, You can pretty much see that this is what i do all day, with the exceptions of days when my husband is free and we go grocery shopping together or when he comes home to stay the night from the pub. I mean, I am never quite a loner, but I just some how don't really fit in here. Well then again, there is the age gap with the girls here. I mean they are like 20, 21 or younger and all they do is go out and get pissed... I mean seriously, If I was that age again, I would, and Cheryl would agree with me cos when I was 21, 22, 23, all we did was go Zouk every wednesday (More like me) or go to a Starbucks hang around. Now, I just can't catch up or keep up with them. As I age, I just want to have it easy, like go out to have a drink, sit down and talk and just enjoy people's company. I am starting to miss all my best friends back home more now then ever, Especially Cheryl, Aric and Teeny. Gwad how I miss them all.

At any rate, If I don't keep myself occupied, I might go mad soon with waiting for the visa and the lack of human interaction isn't helping much. Which is making me wonder why I have an obsession with crocheted bikinis at the moment. To add insult to this situation, I some how managed to start writing again, Which means AIKIKO REI Will be resurrected, BUT!!!! and I mean a big BUT... I did start on two different chapters.. and don't know how to continue.. I guess I will be working on it again... ANIME time.

Also, I kindda revived my obsessions with GACKT.. I bought his new EPs from itunes and got it into my Ipod.. and I noticed the difference in his voice now then before. It's deeper and more timbre compared to before. which kind of send chills down my spine... But then again I digress and I am talking alot of crap now...

Guess it's boredom and loneliness for you... ^_^